Donald Trump is turning 79 years old in June. How is the dipsh** in chief planning to celebrate it? With a slice of birthday cake and a Diet Coke? Hah!
He wants to throw a parade stretching from the Pentagon to the White House. It’ll be a military extravaganza, complete with tanks, artillery p;ieces and soldiers marching.
All to commemorate the birthday of a man who:
- Has said he doesn’t want to be photographed with wounded warriors.
- Avoided service during the Vietnam War, citing bone spurs.
- Has called men captured by enemy forces during war “losers.”
- Denigrated Gold Star families who lost sons in battle.
This individual wants to spend tens of millions of dollars on a parade ostensibly to mark the Army’s 250th anniversary. In reality, he wants to stand at the center of it all and bask in the reflected glory of the men and women who defend a Constitution that Trump is seeking to shred into a million pieces.
This clown is a disgrace.
You paint Trump’s proposed parade as a narcissistic farce, but that’s a one-sided take ignoring broader context. If it happens, June 14, 2025, isn’t just Trump’s 79th birthday—it’s the U.S. Army’s 250th anniversary, a milestone already slated for celebration. The Army had been planning festivities for years, per defense officials, and Trump’s involvement could amplify a legitimate national event, not just stroke his ego. Military parades aren’t alien to U.S. history—think 1991’s Gulf War victory march—nor are they inherently about the president. France’s Bastille Day, which inspired Trump in 2017, blends national pride with military might, and he’s openly admired it. Dismissing this as a personal vanity project skips the possibility it’s also about showcasing American strength, a consistent Trump theme.
The personal attacks lean on selective truths. Yes, he dodged Vietnam with bone spurs—a common deferment then, not unique to him. The “losers” quote is disputed; Trump denies it, and some aides back him, though others don’t. His Gold Star spats were clumsy, but he’s also honored troops elsewhere—hundreds of wreath-layings, veteran events, and a 2020 Medal of Honor ceremony. The wounded warrior photo claim feels like a stretch without hard proof; he’s met amputees publicly, like at Walter Reed. Your outrage cherry-picks to frame him as a hypocrite, ignoring moments that don’t fit your narrative.
Cost-wise, “tens of millions” isn’t outrageous for a major D.C. event—2019’s “Salute to America” hit $13 million with less scale. If tanks roll, road damage is a fair gripe, but Bowser’s past $21 million security estimate suggests local costs, not just federal. Trump’s not “shredding” the Constitution here; he’s flexing executive prerogative, like it or not. The “disgrace” label is subjective—plenty see him as a patriot, not a clown. This piece vents more than it dissects, assuming the worst without weighing the other side.
Trump doesn’t give a shit about the Army’s anniversary. He calls us “losers” for serving. The prick.
Oh, come on now, calling Trump the Grinch of the Army’s birthday bash? That’s a stretch! The guy’s been known to toss out more “tremendous” compliments to our troops than candles on a 250-year-old Army cake. Sure, some folks say he threw shade with a “losers” line, but that’s more like a game of telephone gone wild—no receipts, just whispers! Let’s not paint him as a total Scrooge just yet; he’s probably got a “Yuge Army Anniversary” tweet cooking for June. Give the man a chance to salute before we roast him, alright?