Grief takes many forms and it produces myriad responses to the thought that your loved one is no longer by your side.
I have mentioned to you before that I discovered much about myself when my bride and I moved from the comfort of our surroundings in Oregon many years ago to advance my career in Texas. I learned how adaptable I am.
My adaptability is undergoing the sternest test imaginable these days. It has been less than a week since cancer took my beloved bride from me. The savagery of the disease caught everyone by surprise. We had hope for a positive outcome, and I expressed that hope here.
Then tragedy struck with a shocking vengeance on Jan. 26 when my wife suffered a grand mal seizure, from which she did not recover.
A new life has commenced for me. I am still struggling, to be sure, with the knowledge that she’s gone. I see her everywhere in my North Texas home. Her presence, while she’s not here in person, remains in every room.
We are going to lay her to rest soon. Then we will travel to where she and I carved out a great life in the Texas Panhandle to celebrate my bride’s glorious life.
Meanwhile, my personal learning curve continues to present challenges I never have experienced. Still, I am hopeful that the self-discovery I made in 1984 when we settled in Beaumont after living my entire life in the Pacific Northwest will evolve into this new form of adaptability.
I believe I am up for the challenge that awaits … but it won’t be without intense pain. Of that I am utterly certain.