The people who love those who were aboard Malaysia Air Flight 370 are enduring the worst of this tragedy.
They are waiting for any hint, a clue, a tiny tidbit of knowledge about their fate. Absent that, their minds are playing terrible tricks on them. They are having fanciful dreams of a miracle that those aboard the plane that vanished without a trace — so far — after taking off March 8 from Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia en route to Beijing.
I know a little bit about what they’re going through. I’ll share a brief version of a personal tragedy in my own family’s history.
On the morning of Sept. 8, 1980, I received a phone call at work. The voice on the other end told me my father was missing after a boating accident just north of Vancouver, British Columbia. Four men were aboard a small craft; two of them were safe; the other two were missing. Dad was one of the men missing — and he was presumed dead.
I took a deep breath, called my wife and went home to prepare to tell my mother the terrible news.
The next day, I boarded a small plane to the fishing camp where Dad and his business associates were staying. The Royal Canadian Mounted Police were conducting a search of the saltwater inlet for any sign of Dad’s body. After two days they hadn’t found anything.
I returned home and we all waited for news. Meanwhile, my mind was fantasizing about Dad. He was alive, traipsing around in the forest, undetected by civilization.
I knew intellectually that wasn’t the case. I knew he was gone. But we didn’t have any tangible evidence of what happened to him.
Eight days later, the evidence arrived with a phone call from the Mounties. They found Dad. I was relieved and heartbroken at the same time. But we had closure and were able to say goodbye properly.
This is what those who are waiting for news about Flight 370 might be going through. They well could be clinging to the thinnest reed of hope that their loved ones are miraculously OK; that they landed on a remote island; that they’re waiting for someone to fly overhead to detect them, rescue them and return them to those who love them.
Those loved ones know better, but their minds and hearts could be playing terrible tricks on them.
Their pain defies description.